Dear Messenger of God,
Assalaatu wassalaamu alayka ya Sayyidi ya Rasul Allah …
I know you are reading this, hearing this, I know that this is a direct connection to you.
I wrote to you last year, and I know that you read it, you heard it, that it was a direct connection to you. I was reaching out, but I was so frustrated at feeling disconnected, and all of the circumstances that had led to that moment of feeling disconnected…
I still feel disconnected, but I won’t let disconnection take over this time (I know it is just an illusion, it is from of the state of my heart. Please, if you can help me with this…)
I can tell you that I still don’t know very much about you, in the meaning of – stories about you, your story, what it might mean if someone were to ask me what I know about you. I still have very, very little. For a while that brought me a sense of shame, and I thought that was the reason that I couldn’t connect.
Until someone was sent into my life who carries that light in a way that is blinding, brighter than anyone I have ever seen.
Here are just a few of the things that I have learned from this very special person, that were turning points in my relationship with you:
- There are people, including illiterate women, who also couldn’t tell others much about you, but their essence, their very being exudes what it means to follow you. Salawat is transformative in that way. You are here for everyone, and there are ways for everyone to connect to you.
- Salawat is the wing of mercy because we don’t know of anything else that we do that is going to be accepted. It is a means of ascension in every state and every moment. It is something to hold onto with everything we have.
- Love for you is the beating heart of this Ummah. That is why we were given the capacity for love, that is the only reason – so that we may love you and love God, and nothing else. There are ways to grow in this love (they are showing me)
- Everything that we have of guidance, everything that we are learning about this religion, is coming from you – you are the source, the wellspring of all of that goodness, and that suffices as a basis for gratitude and joy
- Everything that we see in this world that is good – everything – is flowing from your light. I can learn about you from the goodness that I see all around, and know that that is what you were like, but to an infinite degree…
Most of these huge turning points have happened within the past year … I believe wholeheartedly that there is only going to be more. Perhaps this is one of them.